PSL; [It's bigger than us, it's bigger than everything]

[bleps]

((ooc; cont. from here))

[Anything happening within the walls of Hank's house is now being shattered by the blaring of the doorbell. Once, twice, a third time for a bit longer. Less an actual doorbell and more of a buzzer, a harsh thing that is sure to grab the attention of anyone possessing a heartbeat within. The very obvious sign of someone (a certain RK800 unit) at the door, hoping to find the Lieutenant at his home if he cannot be located at his usual haunts. The sort that serves alcohol, mainly.]

Lieutenant?

[The voice should ring familiar, if not slightly muffled by the obstruction before him. Connor stands waiting, straight-backed, staring at the closed door like the obstacle it is to his entry. The usual curl of hair that falls across his forehead sways in the breeze as he waits, only half-patiently.]

Lieutenant! [The downwards cant of his head, just slightly, eyes averted to the side; the look of someone listening for noise within.] Are you home?

Comments

[fuck1ngusernam3]

[The abrupt switch away from Connor saying he just likes Hank because he likes him, the weird guilty feeling that oozes up in Hank when Connor says that and the sudden, unexpected release from it makes Hank laugh, genuinely laugh. He ducks his head against the seat as he does it, slumping over his crossed arms to slide further down in his seat.]

There you go, it's a lot more rational than you thought after all. I mean, who can resist a big dumb face like that? You can't resist one either, right Sumo?

[Hank peers over behind his seat and Sumo gives a low boof, his tail thumping a couple times against the door behind him. Hank grins, satisfied at having just insulted the faces of the two people that matter the most in this world.]

Hey, look, it's mutual.

[bleps]

A "big dumb face". [Connor is ever hard to offend when it comes to something like this, as has been proven in the past. As such, he is hardly offended now, not when the atmosphere has so obviously taken on something far more humorous. It acts to ease the tension, even if such a thing will only ever be temporary.]

Then what does that say about you? You've lived with him much longer than I've even known him.

[fuck1ngusernam3]

[Hank’s mouth twitches back up into a smile again, and his voice is fond.]

Yeah, he’s put up with me for a while. But nature slapped this together by accident, yours is that way on purpose. Sumo’s kind of a connoisseur that way, he can tell real dumb when he sees it.

[bleps]

[Connor almost laughs at that, but instead huffs out the tiniest bit of air in disbelief that certainly isn't sincere.]

I think CyberLife would take issue with you criticizing their design work so harshly. An inordinate amount of research has gone into both my voice and appearance.

[They've sort of had this conversation in passing before, though Hank was a bit harsher then.]

[fuck1ngusernam3]

Yeah, ‘inordinate’ is the right word for it. Who’d they research, a buncha preteens oohing and aahing over baby’s first boyband pictures?

[Last time he said something like this it was deliberate, a pointed way to tell Connor his attempts to bond weren’t working. This time it’s the opposite; this time Hank’s just razzing him and is obviously enjoying himself, just starting to get into his groove.]

[bleps]

[Wow get Connor some ice for that sick burn

Though it’s a little above his head, references that require more than a modicum or pop culture knowledge that he doesn’t always possess.]

And are you implying something more than the fact that I would apparently be suited for the entertainment industry?

[fuck1ngusernam3]

Hey, you said it, not me.

[As easy as it would be to turn that into a joke about Connor admitting he'd make a good stripper, or something, that kinda feels like it'd make things weird. So Hank leaves the implied whatever at that. He'll probably wait until the poor kid's been out in the real world for more than a month before he makes those sorts of jokes. Keep it PG, Hank.]

Nah, you just got the kinda face that'd be on some tween magazine, you know? Why, what did you think I was implying?

[bleps]

[Hank, did you forget that they went to an android sex club together? Though admittedly, maybe a stripper comment would make the conversation go down a very awkward path that the other man wouldn’t be prepared for.]

I have a face that is meant to be pleasant and approachable. I simply thought you were implying that I had a handsome face, which would contradict the point you were trying to make. But I guess that is what you were saying.

[fuck1ngusernam3]

Well- [Hank tilts his head, studying the face in question.] Yeah, I guess that's it. I mean, you all look like you're about to walk into a photoshoot at any second, which I guess makes sense, but you look like... Good looking in a harmless, dorky kind of way. Not really the kind of look I'd expect them to go in for on a cop bot. You can look goofy and handsome at the same time, you know, just cause I'm all one all the time doesn't mean both are mutually exclusive.

[bleps]

[Unsure if they’re still talking in underhanded compliments, Connor falls back into rational thinking. His reply is to reason out his supposed “goofiness” as pointed out by Hank.]

Don’t forget that I was also created for the sake of negotiation. I’m sure what you’re perceiving as “goofy” [to use Hank’s inelegant term] was just an attempt to not look intimidating to those I’m trying to talk down.

[Every part of his design had a purpose, he was certain of it. Of course, it could simply be Hank’s perception of him, which he could hardly change.]

[fuck1ngusernam3]

Mmm. Yeah, that makes sense.

[Hank slumps a little further still. He doesn't need to sleep, that's still true, but he's relaxing now and has to brace his feet on the side of the footwell against it.]

But I don't know, there's lotsa ways you can get someone to trust you, if you know what you're doing. You saying I don't have a face that can charm someone into a confession? [Hank doesn't bother to hide his little grin.] Gotta be a cleancut prettyboy to make it work?

[bleps]

[An arch of the brow as he neatly sidesteps the “clean-cut pretty boy” comment.]

Being charming consists of a multitude of factors. Appearance actually has very little to do with it.

[He gives the appearance of scrutinizing Hank, a look that the man should probably recognize. The same way Connor peers at a piece of evidence.]

It has more to do with attitude and demeanor. Yours is often... rough around the edges.

[fuck1ngusernam3]

Heh.

[Hank blinks slowly as his body keeps trying to tell him it's time to doze, and mentally awards a point to Connor. He's not wrong.]

I dunno, I used to clean up okay. But I mean, some people respond to rough too. You think you got to be smooth and polite all the time to get the job done?

[bleps]

No. But that’s not charm. That’s intimidation.

[He knows the difference, being what he is. Being able to do both.]

...take a nap, Lieutenant. You look you’re about to fall asleep.

[fuck1ngusernam3]

That your example of bein' charming?

[Hank lets his eyelids do what they want for a moment - and only a moment - before he takes a slow breath and blinks them open again. Yeah, sure, nap, whatever, he's got heckling to do.]

That wouldn't convince a housefly to take a nap.

[Do houseflies nap? Yes. Yes they do. Fuck you.]

[bleps]

[Um, no? Incorrect.]

I don’t think houseflies nap.

[Thus your point is invalid!]

[fuck1ngusernam3]

Well, fuck, not when you talk to em that way they don't.

[Hank squints balefully at Connor. Or maybe at the concept of napping. Or maybe at the idea that he doesn't know much about wildlife. All three? Yeah, he can multitask, let's say all three.]

[bleps]

[It’s almost amazing how Hank can be nearly as stubborn as Connor. The android pauses, giving an idea an assessment, before clarifying with a question:]

Am I supposed to construe this as a challenge to charm you to sleep?

[fuck1ngusernam3]

[Hank ducks his head with a breathy half-laugh. In the not-quite-awake state his brain's in, the noise almost sounds like a giggle.]

Yeah, sure, why not. Show me what you got, Sandman. What's your first charm-offensive gonna be?

[bleps]

[This is half ridiculous, and half an actual challenge — for good or ill, Connor always finds it somewhat difficult to let go of the latter.

Besides, anything to encourage Hank to actually sleep like a real human being for a change. Even if it is just a nap.]

Well. Then first I’d have you close your eyes and focus on my voice. Think you can do that for me?

[fuck1ngusernam3]

That's cheating.

[If he wasn't still smiling this look would absolutely be a glare. It's sort of glare-like. Feel Hank's wrath.]

I close my eyes and that'll cut your, uh... [He tries to think of whatever word he's trying to think of, and doesn't get there.] your charm-time in half, and you know that. Sneaky fucker. Bet you cheat at Monopoly, too.

[bleps]

[Dammit. Hank is still unfortunately still sharp for someone who looks like he's about to fall asleep; Connor had been banking on the fact that the man would close his eyes and therefore let him win half the battle immediately.

But like any good cheater bluffer, he keeps his poker face on.]

That wasn't my reasoning at all. I just don't want you getting distracted by anything else in the car.

[You know. Like.... Sumo.]

[fuck1ngusernam3]

[There's that giggle again, quieter but there.]

Bullshit, more bullshit! You know, for a guy whose every word cost about a thousand dollars to design, I'm not seeing much expertise here. Was all that shit about being designed to be charming just talk, or...?

[bleps]

[Eyebrows raise even further, because while this is humorous, it's still turning into more of a goading challenge (thanks to Hank's words) more than anything else.]

I can be as charming as I like, but if you're going to stubbornly attempt to not sleep, the point is moot. I'm fine with you not closing your eyes, but you still need to willfully listen to my voice regardless.

[This would honestly be more meditation than it would be an exercise in charm, but Hank doesn't need to know that.]

Is that acceptable?

[fuck1ngusernam3]

Wow, no, that's actually a terrible start Connor, you know that right? But hey, I'm a generous guy, I'll give you another chance. I'll listen to whatever, once the charm actually starts up. If it's just more of this you might actually have to tell me when that is but uh, I'll listen.

[Hank's looking a little - a teeny itsy bitsy little - bit less asleep now, maybe because heckling gives him power. He's still all slumped over and curled up, but his eyes are actually focusing.]

I can even give you like, little icebreakers or something, if that'll help? Let's see, uh- So, Connor, what does an android who's never actually slept think sleep is like? Tell me what's good about it, talk me into that. Or, I don't know, whatever super convincing thing you were about to do.